Thursday, December 16, 2010

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Inspired By Kat...

Kat's angst-y post about boys was so inspiring that now getting distracted by a Reese's commercial. Oh how I love Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. But that's not the point! Gah. Let me try again.


Here's the thing. You've been one of my life's best friends (so far), and I truly miss how close we used to be. Originally this was supposed to be a post about how well I am doing not thinking about you, but instead, I'm going to list all the things I loved about our friendship.

1. You were there for me when I thought I had nowhere to turn.

2. You let me cry when I wanted to be strong.

3. You invited me over just because we enjoyed each other's company.

4. You played with my little brothers.

5. You taught me how to wakeboard.

6. You would take me to Wendy's whenever it struck my fancy.

7. You kidnapped me on my birthday so we could watch cowboy movies.

8. You stayed up late to talk to me when I needed to talk.

9. You came over to do math homework with me.

10. You put up with all my complaining about silly things.

11. You fell asleep whenever we were watching tv, and didn't mind when I woke you up.

12. You hugged me.

13. You offered to hold my hand so I'd have the courage to jump.

14. You went fishing with my dad and little brother.

15. You didn't mind when I laughed at you.

16. You let me play your piano.

17. Your mom always fed me.

18. Your dogs loved me (and I loved them).

19. Your family told me that they liked me.

20. You always knew when something was wrong.

Need I go on? You were a great friend to me. But I stood by while you went through quite a few girlfriends who you didn't really care about, and who didn't really care about you. I pretended not to care that you didn't get me a birthday present. I pulled myself together when I was sick and you wanted to do something. I helped you choose Valentine's gifts for your girlfriends. I hung out with you and your girlfriend whenever you asked me because no one else would (even thought it was painful).

You probably never even noticed. You probably don't care that our friendship will never be quite the same.

Torn up? Yeah. Feeling better? Yeah.

Love always,

Friday, December 10, 2010

Because Any Day Can Stand a Few More Laughs...

"I need big thumbs for the manly things that men do. Like hitting things...with hammers. ESPECIALLY sledge hammers." -Nick W.

"Don't be offended if I don't write anything profane. I mean profound!" -Mary N.

"I'm masculine and easy." -Sister Liana

"Voldemort's not really a party animal..." -Joseph C.

"Zombiism and communism go hand in hand!" -Nick W.

"When I pulled your toe, I heard piano music." -Kaela C.

"Is there a Nobel Prize for cooking? No, seriously!" -Nick W.

"Kate is like a cape in that she's flowing and beautiful, and she'll strangle you if you put her on too tight." -Andy P.

"I thought Jesus spoke English!" -Wade

"But Mom, he scattered my pants across the galaxy!" -Isaac

"You're trying to argue with me, but we have no....qualms." -Riley B.

"Good times like a stream of gold cheese." -Christian P.

"I curse your mustaches. BOTH OF THEM!"

"Jesus was a lot like Elvis, only WAY more famous!" -Isaac

"If the moon was a banana, it would have enough potassium to give you a heart attack!" -Nick W.

"I wholeheartedly agree, my African-American brother!" -Melody P.

"What?! Don't I give good back massages??" -Christian G.

"I once killed a colony of ants. With fire." -Christian P.

"Bassoons sound like someone is farting. Cellos sound like someone is sculpting an angel!" -John W.

"Your wig plus my tights equals a party." -Joseph C.

"He's never been pulled over because he...well....never mind." -Mrs. V

"Oh middle finger!" -Dad

"I want bacon, pancakes, and dessert for dinner! And for dessert, I want more dessert!" -Mom

"Today is Steak Sunday. I mean Fast Sunday." -Emma C.

"Nick, look at the flag." "I don't need to! I can see its reflection in your eyes." -Nick W.

"Can you imagine how dysfunction society would be if everyone was ME?" -Jozi B.

"Hufflepuff is the platypus of Hogwarts." -Kat

"Don't take the repeats. Now, let's repeat straight through!" -Mr. Larson

"According to Darwinism, if I hunt only really fast creatures, eventually I'll have rockets for legs." -Christian P.

"We're not crazy." "Yeah, if we were crazy, we'd be holding knives." -Christian & Caleb

"Veal can apparate onto the Death Star." -Jozi B.

"Henry David Thoreau is going to shoot you. He liked rifles." -Christian P.

"You don't have to move! It's like your marinating my seat!" -Steffany B.

"That guy is like a buffalo. A wild, rabid buffalo."

"Chopin was like the AC/DC of a long, LONG time ago." -Nick G.

"You know, avocados would sell a lot better if they were marketed as zombie pears." -Joseph M.

"That wasn't a punch! It was a friendly pat on the arm...with my fist." -Nick G.

"Gouda cheese?! I LOVE GOUDA CHEESE! It's like Buddha, but cheese!" -Caleb K.

"No one would know you were wearing a biohazard suit if you were also wearing a Buzz Lightyear costume!" -Jozi B.

"This book starts with a throng of bearded men and women." -Mrs. V

"Let's play kill your neighbor! The rules are simple." -John W.

I hope these lovely quotes have produced some kind of happiness in your soul this day. :o)

Love always,

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Shake It!

The day starts as any day would. You wake up, ready yourself for the day, grab some breakfast (maybe), and before you know it, you find yourself at school. Even still, the day seems decidedly ordinary. Nothing has gone well, nothing has gone badly. UNTIL YOU GET TO THE FIRST PERIOD OF THE DAY!

You settle yourself down in your very assigned seat (you wouldn't choose to sit there if it was up to you). The class begins in the usual way, but all of a sudden, an earthquake strikes! You are almost ready to throw yourself under the desk for protection when you notice that nobody else seems disturbed. Then you see that your desk is the only one shaking.

Inconspicuously, you glance over your shoulder and see that the girl sitting behind you has her feet on the back legs of your desk and is shaking up and down and back and forth like she's having a seizure.

Your options at this point are:

1. Scoot your desk as far forward as possible.

2. Run screaming from the room.

3. Turn around and, while shaking her desk violently, say, "How do you like it now?!"

(These solutions may or may not produce the desired result.)


I know that the day is long and sitting in a desk for hours on end gets boring. Really, I do! But could you put your feet down?

*shake shake shake*

I don't want your legs to cramp up, so shake them all around if you want! But please, do it away from me and my desk.

*shake shake shake*

Look, my desk isn't a massage chair. As much as I'm enjoying this, would it be too much trouble to ask you to hold off until someone else is sitting in front of you?

*shake shake shake*

My notes have random squiggles all over them now because no matter when I put my pencil to the paper, the desk immediately starts shaking under it! I can't focus on the board because my vision is rocking to and fro with the erratic movements of your legs! Just hold still!

*shake shake shake*

Nothing works.

I like to call these people "Shaking Robots."

If you or someone you love is infected by this common but dangerous disease, please contact your physician right away.


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Happiness Is.....

I'm going to assume that most of you have heard that cheesy song about happiness being two kinds of ice cream, finding your skate key, and telling the time. Well, I was thinking about that song today and realized I don't know the rest of the words after those first three

As is well known throughout the world, when you don't know the words to a song, there are two solutions.

1. Stop singing and pick a song you know the words to.

2. (Which makes much more sense) Make up your own words!

So, I made up my own list of happy things to fill in the holes left by my faulty memory for lyrics.

Happiness is:

Singing your heart out and really meaning it. Carol of Joy, anyone?

Dancing when you think nobody's looking, and continuing to dance when you realize they are.

Wearing a skirt that will poof out when you twirl.

Picking sun warmed tomatoes off the vine (in the summer, obviously) and DEVOURING them!

Having someone hold their arms out for you to come to.

Sitting in front of a glowing Christmas tree.

Climbing to the top of a tree and doing the most hideous, voice-cracking, mannish Tarzan yell you can possibly muster.

Being told your Dad's overly large, plaid (plaid!) Christmas sweater looks good on you. By several people! Not the least of which being two or three very attractive young men.

Getting a slightly awkward but really excellent back massage from the (really cute) guy you sit next to in A Capella.

Playing the solo of your dreams and being complimented by dozens of admiring fans! Dozens!

Staying up late to finish a book (except when it's Devil in the White City. Don't stay up late to read that one. Read it in broad daylight. Seriously.)

Whispering and laughing with your friends while another friend does a strange, seductive dance during the baby orchestra's songs. *ahem JOHN WILSON cough cough*

Feeling terrible, then coming home and eating a full quarter of a fresh, warm, delicious, homemade apple pie and feeling much, MUCH worse. And yet somehow better!

Looking at your blog post from LAST December (shamefully close to the top...) and realizing it's not too late to amend your ways!

Sniffling loudly, which means that the mucus is finally coming out your nose instead of your throat! (Honestly. Be grateful it comes out your nose.)

Being greeted enthusiastically by a rather handsome fellow you may or may not be smitten with. *giggle*

The fact that it's nearly Christmas. That in and of itself makes everything else automatically more cheerful!

So. Let me explain. (No, there is too much. Let me sum up.) Sometimes, happiness seems like your overall well-being and accomplishment. But let's be real, if your happiness depended entirely on your general condition, we'd be happy a pitifully small percentage of our lives. Happiness can (and should!) be found in unexpected little joys. Like those listed above. Find joy in the journey, my friends! Live to dance in the rain, not simply to weather the storm!

A favorite quote of mine from Neil Peart (who is an AMAZING drummer, by the way):
"Happiness isn't a destination, it's a mode of transportation!"

The message for the day: BE HAPPY! And know that I love you.